Dough balls

Today I had a rather nice lie in, then got up in a shock when I realised the time. I got ready for work and headed to the Load. Did a few hours there and did maths equations with Dain. Sam then gave me a lift to Uxbridge where I had to pick up an aerial booster from Argos and some stuff for my uni work.
When I returned home I drank many cups of tea before Jess came round. I spoke to her about some various events and things that have been nagging on me and then we left to meet the others for Pizza Express. Jess, Han and I obviously had dough balls and chicken caesar salad because that's what we always have! :)
After stuffing our faces we headed to the Met, I only stayed for one drink as my bed was calling for me.


I seem to be crying myself to sleep more often than not these days. I see things and over think them. Then worry and get so upset I feel like I can’t breathe :(
I’m so fucking stupid, I wish I didn’t care.

Easter

Thursday I met up with Jess and we went to Tattoo UK to inquire about a tattoo I want to get, should really book it soon but I'm nervous!
After a quick spot of dinner she came back to mine and we spent the evening watching Matilda, Jackass and The sex ed show and eating popcorn. It got pretty late so she ended up staying, I always love to wake up spooning Jess :P


My aunt and cousin came over Friday for a catch up and lunch. We scoffed ourselves with easter eggs and we played on the Xbox and Wii :) In the evening I went to Ian's, watched Tremors and drank tea.
Saturday we lazed about in bed for a bit and then watched Serenity on blu-ray because we are so cool :) I unfortunately had depart before the end of the film as I had to get ready for the evenings plans.
Once I was ready my grandad gave me a lift to Jess's where we rendezvoused with Jade and Hannah for pre-drinks. We met up with the others in Uxbridge for further pre-drinks at the Met before getting a cab to Watford to celebrate Jade and Louis's birthday. We went to Rehab where they were doing buy one get one free on all drinks. I took full advantage of this and got very drunk, very quick :)
We later moved on to Vodka Revs where Louis brought a tray of shots which were rather disgusting.
After loosing everyone and then finding them again we went to McDonalds and stuffed our faces. Hannah was out of it, Jacob was chundering and I passed out on Jason's lap. I personally had an awesome night but I know a few people didn't enjoy it as much due to silly cab drivers. But we all back safe in the end :)


I was woken up too early for my liking Sunday morning and told I was going to my aunts for easter lunch whether I liked it or not. Other than feeling nauseous I had a really good time. Lovely food and playing old games on the xbox :)
My mom gave me a lift home early as I was going to watch Brannigan's Law play at the Crown and Treaty for a charity event. I met up with everyone at the Met so we could use our voucher we got from the quiz and get free drinks and food. When we got to the Treaty we watched GONE, a band Ian was in but is now scary due to a screamo female singer. We watched Death Remains as well, they aren't my ideal genre but the atmosphere was awesome.
After many drinks, some containing cheese and bitching with Keri, Brannigan's Law played. They were really good, the crowd was awesome with lots of moshing, Lee's dancing was incredible and I am still in shock at the noises he and Ian can produce and pull of as singing :P


After some more drinks Ian and I got a cab back to mine. We stayed up for a quite a while talking about stuff that I hope is sorted now.
The next day he departed quite early as he had to get his dissertation bound but once that was done I went to his to watch Dr Who. It was awesome but can you really expect anything less than that from it :P
After some dinner we lazed in bed and spent the evening watching films and previous episodes of Dr Who :)
Ian has returned to Reading for a few days now so hopefully I can concentrate on getting my uni done, really don't want to go back next week :/

Winning

Monday nothing very interesting happened I don't think.
Tuesday I went to Ian's for a little bit to watch the new episode of Fringe and just spend some time with him. Miss him so much at the moment, he is writing his dissertation so understandably I can't see him as much as I would like and his reception at home is terrible so we can't even talk over the phone :( But it was lovely to see him for a while and he brought me a calipo :)
In the evening I met up with a few people down the Met. We entered the pub quiz as a bit of laugh and got rather drunk playing drinking games. When you enter the quiz you get a raffle ticket as well. Our team ended up winning the quiz and getting a £15 bar tab and food combo which we intend on using Sunday. After the winners were called they did the raffle, which I won!!! You then had to choose 1 out of 3 boxes and in 1 was £45, I was so winning that night and guessed correctly!! I brought everyone a drink and had an awesome night.


Today I woke up feeling a little rough but manned my way through and went to work at the Load. I intended on doing uni work when I got home but that failed so just watched telly. That got pretty boring by the evening so after dinner I made my way to the Met again just so I could get out the house. Everyone decided to go somewhere different so I left and came home and now I plan to sleep :)

Too much has happened for a title

Tuesday I uni worked during the day. Have made a few pieces of jewellery now which I am rather pleased with, shall photograph soon and share with you all. In the evening Jess and Becky came over, we had a wonderful catch up and got slightly drunk. Hannah joined us later for some amusing antics.
Wednesday I cleaned at the Load and then went to Ian's and ordered chinese takeaway. I have missed the taste of aromatic duck. We watched a film called Monsters and I played Tiny Wings for a bit before departing home. A few bits I ordered offline came this day too, a mustard coloured skirt, floral headband and a knitted vintage jumper.
Thursday I did some more uni work during the day. As Tuesday night was such good fun the girls and I decided to repeat it. They came round in the evening and we stuffed ourselves with pizza, spring rolls, pringles, popcorn and plenty of Malibu :) It was a really funny night, I do love those lassies.


Friday I went to Ian's to clean, he was sat in a cupboard writing his dissertation the majority of the time, nevertheless it was nice to see him for a bit. He then had to leave for a band practice so we went our separate ways. After some dinner I went to the Load. There were a few people there so had a few drinks and ate quavers :)
Saturday I helped tidy up around the house and did some uni work. In the evening I went to the Load, was meant to go to the Treaty after a while but lost track of the time so ended up staying there. Drank a far bit, stayed with Lawson, Darren, Matt and Dain. After the pub closed we made our way to the bicentennial gardens with a few bottles of wine and had a camp fire. Dragged my arse home about half 4 and passed out.
Have only got out of bed today to eat some bread, top up my glasses of water and get the Back to the Future box set. Watched all 3 one after the other. Apart from feeling like I was going to chunder every time I moved it has been a good day.

I find this so funny.

Distanced

I feel really cut out from everyone on my uni course, not because I don’t get on with them, some of them are amazing and I have so much in common with them, but I live quite far from them all and I can’t go out in the evenings when they do because my bus stops at 7pm :/ I really wish I had learnt to drive. It’s no ones fault but my own, I don’t even go into uni that often because I have to get up so blooming early and it takes forever to get there and I’m lazy. I wish I had tried harder to get to know people.

I met one girl and I thought she was awesome and we got on so well, now she wouldn’t even look at me if we walked past eachother, she changed so much and I feel angry that she ditched me, I didn’t make an effort with anyone else because I didn’t want to get hurt again and I thought “hey, it’s only a year!” Regret that so much, everyone has their clicks now and when I do go in I feel quite alone.

The group I sometimes hang with are in a different building so I can’t go over there that much which sucks, but when I do see them I always get on really well with them and have a great laugh. On the Amsterdam trip I got on so well with people and I was so happy that I made new friends and everything seemed good, but I have just distanced myself yet again :/

The people that are specializing in jewellery like me I have no contact with. I’m getting a bit stuck with what I’m meant to be doing for my project and I have no one I can ask, the tutors are crap because they never email me back and I feel so lost and alone :/

Sorry for my pathetic and emotional twaddle.

Sun and drinks

Friday was yet another glorious day of sunshine. I hung out with some people down the bicentennial gardens and then in the evening I went to the Load and met up with Ian and Brannigan's Law after their band practice. I had one drink and then went to Ian's for the night.
Saturday I returned to mine for a bit and then went back to his for lovely pasta he made :) We met up with various people in the evening at the Met, we drank there for a bit and then moved onto the Treaty. It was a really good night, got to meet lots of new people and ate an amazing chicken burger before returning home :)


When Ian and I got up, rather hungover, my dad had cooked BBQ lamb with lots of nice salads and stuff so we tucked into that while sitting outside with the family.


Ian then had to leave and get on with his work. I stayed outside and soaked up the sun. In the evening I went to Ian's, other people were meant to join but they cancelled :/ We watched Unstoppable with his parents and ate Percy pigs :) Tom then gave me a lift home.
Today I have done lots of uni work and ate tonnes of food.
The sun has disappeared and it looks like it's going to rain, stupid English weather!

Lazy

Haven't been blogging as regularly as I used to, I have been distracted by Tumblr and if I'm honest I have just been lazy. So excuse me if things are a little vague because I can't really remember what days I did what or even what I did.
I know that at some point Ian came over for an evening and we watched Perfume story of a murderer, it's a crazy weird film but I really do love it, ate Percy Pigs, which we have got a little addicted to and watched Nitro Circus.


I also did some uni work, well I have done quite a bit but I took some awesome photos through a microscope. Didn't think it would work but it did and I'm really pleased with the outcome :)


Wednesday I worked for a bit down the Load and then made my way to Ian's. Things didn't really go to plan but the day was still lovely. We postponed going to the cinema because we wanted to sit in the sun...

But by the time we got back to his and ordered pizza, I had developed a migraine, so we cancelled cinema and watched Cinderella instead while Ian doctored me back to health.

My grandad has come to stay with us now. He sold his house and now has no where to live. I can't say I'm thrilled with this situation but I have no choice in the matter. Today was spent having awkward, forced conversations with him, doing uni work and staying in on a lovely day :/

Treaty

Fridays evening was awesome, Faye's counselling service works wonders. We went to hers and picked up a bottle of wine on the way. We sat in the garden drinking for a bit and then went to the Met. There were loads of people out we knew and the drinks were flowing at a rapid pace. Ended up going to the Treaty, bumping into a very drunk Tom and drinking whisky, stayed until it closed and then got a cab back.


Woke up feeling a bit worse for wear and was then late getting to Ian's to do cleaning. Felt a bit better after having some food. Popped into Uxbridge and got mumma her present and then went back to Ian's for dinner. He had been feeling rough all day and then threw up about an hour before we were meant to be going out :( I still went out as I said I would meet people but I felt terrible leaving him.
Ended up getting incredibly drunk. Met up with Jess and went to Met where we bumped into loads of people going to Rock night too. Faye was working so we got many sly free drinks. Saw James there who I haven't seen in about 4 years and it was awesome to catch up with him again :)
Think my drink could of been spiked because I don't remember a thing! Things are usually a little hazey after a night out but I have huge chunks just gone! :/ We bumped into Han in Uxbridge on the way back, I was being hit on by a lesbian, I passed out in front of Superdrug and we got a cab home, I don't remember any of this! :/
Good night anyways.


Slept most of today and recovered. Haven't done anything else, Jess and Han was meant to be coming over but we were too hungover so have postponed it. Ian's watching wrestling at his so I'm all alone and so bored!!!!

Smooshing

Monday I did uni work and I think that was pretty much it. Tuesday I did the same during the day. In the evening I went to see Jess's final performance for her uni course. It was really good and of course she was brill :)
Went to the Met with Han and Jacob after for one drink then went home and slept.
Wednesday I worked at the pub for a bit. I was my dads birthday so in the evening we went out for an Indian meal which was very yummy. When we got back Ian came over and we spent the night watching Jackass episodes.
Thursday I was called into work again at the pub because it was really messy, bit of extra money, can't complain. In the afternoon Hannah came over and we made our way to Uxbridge to meet Ryan and Ian. We had won tickets to see Sucker Punch at the IMAX introduced by Zack Snyder, the director :) It was awesome!! Gave us all a bit of a headache though because the screen was so big. Ian and I went back to mine, had some paracetamol and slept.
Today Ian and I had a nice lye-in and then watched Easy A and ate sweets :)
After he left I got on with some more work. Have done all my ideas now so just need to start developing them.
Was meant to be going out for dinner tonight with parents and family friends but all of a sudden I'm not invited and have to stay at home by myself :/ They complain I don't spend enough time with them but when I try they just push me away. They gang up on me too and pretend they didn't say things when they did.

I don't them, I just can't wait until I can move away.
Luckily Faye is at hand and has offered for me to go to hers, have some food and then drink the sorrows away :)